About Me

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Karachi, Pakistan
Pharmaceutical brand manager, Geek, Marketeer, Speaker,Procrastinator, Reader, Thinker, Writer, Blogger.Papa's spoiled daughter.I am ought in this world, searching the reason of my sole existence. A reason I believe ..i will find soon. Love my job and Love to think,read and write.

June 29, 2010

Living in the afterglow..

"Here I am, lost in the light of the moon
that comes through my windows,
Bathed in blue,the walls of my memories divides the thorns from the roses,
its "you" and the roses"
my mind drifts away,
you only have today,
touch me and I will follow,
in your afterglow,
kill me from all this sorrow,
as I let you go,
I will find my way,
I will sacrifice,
and I am living ..
in your afterglow"

Its June 29 today. Its a sunny day, but for me, it has been a day of heavy rains. Rains of memories that fall over you like hard stones. I've never been this depressed in the loneliest of times. Then why today? There has been so much that I havent caught up in ages, but there has been so very much that I have got as a blessing from Allah, but why humans have to always regret. Why dont I show contentment even though I know how much I feel contented.
Talking to a friend yesterday,I confessed that I never want to see "university" again. The place where I have spent the best years of my life, so care-free, with so much laughters, fights over nothing and a reason to celebrate each day without any reason. Sitting together and sharing the joys of bunking classes, Crying together if any one misses out to pass,all those wonderful memories fill my eyes with a saltish liquid. Its been 18 months. I've just been to that place twice, and all alone , and I never want to go there again. Had I knew,there would be tears after all those years os smiles, ihad i knew there would be loneliness after so many joyous moments, I wouldn't have opted to live that life. I miss my friends so much. But we all have grown up, we all have different responsiblities to handle, but I never knew that it would be so heart-breaking to call them to meet and listen that they are busy. Busy! who is not? but for friends.. no, never! I miss them all so dearly. I miss my Pirogenzz tree, i think it is all alone there .. but standing with it, sharing the grief is me. Life goes on, and so we do. I miss my friends, but I dont wish to see them again cuz I know if i see their face, i will remember all the pain that I have gone through. And the pain has now subsided, I dont want the numbness to rise again.
Goodluck to all that you do in ur lives, friends.
You shall always be close to my heart !!

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